Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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