You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
