Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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