I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
