Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
