we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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