You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Randomize