He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize