Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Less talking, more tequila
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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