It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
