Whatcha textin bout Willis?
im six kinds of drunk right now
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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