Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
