Three words: puerto rican gang bang
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
