'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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