She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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