There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
