Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
