You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
