I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
