im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
40s are totally the cure
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Why did my mother make you get naked?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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