I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
