i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
