No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
