i barfeds in our rink
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize