all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
