Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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