It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
