Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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