he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
