Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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