I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
