Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
ok first of all what the fuck
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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