i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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