I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize