Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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