Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
