i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
