Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
why is half of my head shaved?
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