So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Randomize
