I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
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