All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize