god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
