What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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