maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
