Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize