definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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