3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
