just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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