worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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