It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Randomize
