Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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